Tonight I went to a concert to benefit Mission of Hope in Haiti. As watched images of broken people being restored, I thought of how often God uses the evil things of this world for good. On the ride home I heard the following lyric:
I see the faith of our fathers/ Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob/ They never saw what was promised/ But they never once felt forsaken
I realized that perhaps the things I perceive as promises in my life will, like those men in the history of faith, remain unfulfilled for God’s greater purpose. While I would be honored to be such a vessel, it might require emptying myself of many of the dreams I have for my future including marriage and children.
I dare not thwart God’s purposes and plans, and I would rather have what He has for me than what I might choose for myself (as hard as that might be to receive), and I have come to the following conclusion: I trust Him. And I am terrified.